had breakfast with pinky on tuesdaymwai hunnie's baby,..pinkycamwhore with my friend's sunnie without her knowing...(sorry)

went to the beach last fridaywasnt feeling all happy tht day so i dint camwhorerogera close up view of the monkey...

let out all those hurts and fustration by screaming till my throat hurts while we were at the beach...,of course i dint scream alone...,flora,roger and lewis screamed too

missed my bro...went to his room and took a pic....planning to send it to him..

exam week's stressing me out...,and u know wat tht means....,getting lots and lots of ZITS againsee tht pink spot on my cheek?...ya....thts one..i bet more and more of it is on its way to my face...GAHHHHH

met my mum's friend on my way to get some stuffs...tht day....

me:hi aunty...

aunty:hi sunshine..,how r u my cupcake?

i dont get it with her...,calling me sunshineand cupcakes?

for me shes this 60 year old whos still living in the "LALA" land.....shes got no worries,..living life to the fullest...,happily smiling all the time....

gosh...i wish i could be like her...even when i'm not happy...,i could also put a fake smile,but then i'm sick of smilling when i'm hurting inside....i realise tht ever since i left my friends in secondary school...,i'm not as happy as i used to be...,i live life miserably ever since i became a student of riam a-levels....i wish to be near ppl who i can have fun with(my usual silly gang)...wishing tht i could laugh all the time and have no worries like i used to...i remember telling them...'i love hanging out with them and laugh every single day'...even wat pinky wrote in my book reminds me of the times when she said 'we laugh ever corner of the day'...

i wanna enjoy going to sch like i used to...,but then i donno y i'm not happy here in a-levels...,maybe its the fact tht i cant share the silly conversation bout guys with myint,or just act vain with sarah,or hug someone like bu,dance with pinky..( the tango dance remember?)in front of the sch toilet,poke kt and make her go "HEI!!!"...but most of all.., just being around them...and now everything has changed in my life,the guys...the troubles...the fustration...the stress....are all pillling up in my life...and the fact tht me and bu arent really contacting each other as ofterned as we used to....,feel like i'm losing her as a friend...its not tht i'm comparing or complaining friends tht i've met this year with those ppl who i've grown to love hanging with all these years...but of course they are differences rite?...i do like ppl who became my friends this year...but maybe its just tht i've got more problems which i just cant share it out and must solve or just let it settle down by itselfs...

and plus with all these exams makes me feel like banging my head against the wall....

i'm lost