i miss my aunt..just by hearing her voice brings tears to my eyes.

i've recently got my fringe cut...cost me $12..so expensive arrrr...bk in miri, i get it cut off for only Rm 5....obviously the one in black is the one i got on thursday n the one in purple is months bk where i cut my on bangs...

anyhoos...one more week and i'll be at royal ade show...woooo....damm excited.

i woke up with a nightmare, and found out tht i constantly bruise myself in my sleep..tht explains the huge bruise on my arms..omg..jason was right..i do pinch myself in my sleep..haha

i can’t believe i reminded Zhen about something tht leads him to ask me for answers to his question..let me refresh your memory..on 14th august 2009, i wrote 'Zhen left for SG ard 11.30am this morning...till the very last mins, he still wont give up...he wants answers which i cannot give him...he's been asking bout it since April...and at times during our conversation, he would ask the same questions agn...but i always answer him in a joking way or not answer his questions at all...but i told him i'll tell him once he's leaving to HK...and on tuesday 11th aug 2009, he asked the same pathetic question agn!!! While we were having desert at cocolat...yummy cakes and drinks at 8.30 pm..we walked there under the rain....LOl..and i told him i'll give him the answer by friday just b4 he board on the plane...and gosh he's memory is so damm good, as 10 mins b4 he board on the plane just now,he repeated tht question...but i told him i'll give him the answer if we meet agn next year..tht means he must come back to Adelaide and meet up with me next year... :D'

and now, he wont stop bugging me about it, i have to lie...i had too..haha.. i drove up to flinders yesterday, had lunch with him at marion..he said my “DRIVING SKILLS” awesome..well at least someone appreciates my driving without accusing or cursing tht i would crash. Jeez..talk bout the diff btw the girls and Zhen...one more reason of why i love hanging out with zhen. its cause he trust and have faith in me. i dont go risking my friend's lifes. (not unless i'm in 8833)..haha

After lunch, me and Denise went to the animal shelter, i fell in love with ginger the rabbit, while Denise fell in love with pancakes the cat. Both were soooooooooooooooooooooooooooo cute...damm..i felt like taking ginger bk home..but then i know i wont have time for it once i start my placement.

very weird guy: i love how u sneeze..the small little 'hicky' sound u make is sooo cute.

me: erm..yeah...*thumbs up* awesomeeeee *sarcastic tone

very weird guy: *sniff* yummeh...ure hair smells nice

me: *getting a bit annoyed* dont u have anything better to do?

very weird guy: i love hanging out with u

me: well buddy, this might be ure last lucky day to ever see me.

DUDE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! like seriously!!! has all the decent guys died?

Am I delusional or is every single guys turning into a Jason?

i've recently met a guy who pinches me and at the same time says tht i'm cute. i'm racking my brain thinking if i've stepped on his toes and why does he likes to pinch me.thinking it as a revenge.

babe told me that she thinks he likes me…I denied like always. How could it be I told her, as he pinches me all the time? I’m like bruised all over whenever I bumped into him. And thts what babe called as flirting…OMG…flirt = pinch…damyummm I’m already hating him.

Am I bound to meet guys that are a bit weird…first, Jason wants to slap my butt telling me I’m cute and he likes to tickle me…and now a guy pinch me thinking it’s an act of flirting.

i like being with u..but then i would push u away if u get to crummy with me.

i was feeling down yesterday...stuck with insomnia agn...i cancelled out on Janice for sushi last min. Woke up at 9.30 by Zhen’s message...i cant believe he texted me..its like déjàvu with a twist..as i used to do tht last year. As i was still in a very down mood, i agreed to have lunch with him and then dinner..

i donno why during hard times, i find peace when i’m with him..he may be cocky but then when he’s ard, it makes everything feels right. I can just not think about my recent stressful events and hear him talk all day. Maybe its cause of the random things he says tht makes me laugh silly...saying things like ‘i wanna start wearing eyeliner like g-dragon’ with me ‘euiiii-ing’ like usual or saying things like ‘ure friend? U mean the fat and brown one?’ when he say brown one..it got me laughing cause i don’t think I’ve ever hear ppl saying denise being brown..lanny says denise as the black one...omg...

Zhen: go marry a businessman.

Me: no, told u b4...i don’t want a businessman, doctor and lawyer as my husband

Zhen: teacher?

Me: erm...nah...

Zhen: then u go marry a bus driver bar...

Me: haha...well see..

He said i was pretty lazy at the library..haha...yeah...kinda...i was just tired..He showed me his resume it was perfect.. he scored at his presentation today..i was very happy for him. Ppl mistaken him for a Japanese and kept saying ‘konichiwa’ to him..It was hilarious..

I am glad tht he's bk..but with a nicer attitude... he understands and listen to my pain..and we agreed on a lot of things.. I find it easier to hang with him than with the girls..i donno why..AND NO..ppl...pls get this straight..Zhen is just a friend...i respect ming ming..and Zhen is better being my friend..as i don’t like it when I’ve got a cocky/proud bf..

there are times where i wish u were just a wall apart from me.

Maybe it’s the hormones..but almost everything is ticking me off..it annoys the heck out of me... i cant sleep, i cant relax, i’m mentally and psychically exhausted...i’m binge eating and half the time, it doesn’t make me feel good at all.

And then out of the blue, i got a call..lets say i’ve been dreaming/wanting/anticipating for this gift of mine for soooo long...and i’ve specially selected this particular person A to get it for me....but someone else have to pry into my life and changed A’s thinking into changing the shape/colour/what so ever with the gift. And now i’m getting something else which i’ve not wanted, and maybe not my taste at all...its not something u can get like for less than 100 bucks...it cost bout a few thousands...and i cant believe B changed everything..and i feel like crying thinking what i wanted is ruined...i cant believe B pry into my personal life like that...its so unfair..how could B have known the exact thing tht i wanted, everything is settled, the stuff i wanted was paid, i couldnt take it back...I AM VERY ANNOYED... its seriously a very bad timing...i feel like weights are being placed on top of my shoulders...

at times i donno how to manage all this...i felt like giving up..i dont want everyone to look at me like i've given them hopes for the future.

i think those who clicks the 'like' button of their own facebook status or post are a bunch of turds. so much as to comment on it when no one is either sharing their like-ness towards what u wrote or commenting on how much they appreciate what u wrote...this turd clicked the like button of her status which i don’t find amusing nor funny and not only tht, she comments a appreciation note on the isolated post of hers ..wt heck? i can’t believed i accepted this imbecile who crowds my page with non-sense...why does she have to update her post/status every hr...saying things like ‘oo...i’m doing a no.2 in the public toilet’ or ‘i just got a bf’ and two weeks later ‘he broke up with me’ then the next thing u know, she says things like she needs a bf asap. omg...someone pls do me a favour and shoot her pls...

Can i be more..ARG!!!! i donno whats the right word for it..it was just pure crazy...i cant believe i told zhen who i used to like..and tht gave him a lead way to search for tht guy...omg...what sneak...i cant believe i've completely forgotten the fact tht he like to go searching for the guys i like or used to like...

First of all...i really have to give him the credit of remembering most of the ppl i’ve talked about...he asked me hows myint..haha..cause i always talked about how much i’ve missed her alot..and then he asked me hows my brothers, parents, my baby boy, aunt, jed...etc. and he remember things like my past previous doings with the girls..and then he even ask how sean is...omg...hunnie..he rmbers tht too...can he be more freaky...

the outing with zhen wasnt so bad after all..while walking across the road towards him, he says i look nervous and ask me to relax..i dint know tht i look restless...i tot i acted normal...gosh...

we had nam yang's hor fun and char kueh tiaw.. and then went to get gifts for his friends and went to fix my bus ticket...and he took me to state library where we spend 2 hrs there..while at the library, he acted the same where he was b4...showing me pics of pg...and lz....haha..damm funny...we had steamboat for dinner..and it was nice as we both reminded each other of what used to happen in tht half years time we spend together as dorm mates.

he thn reminded me tht last year at the same date as today, we had dinner, we had it cause he was leaving...and this year, we had it cause he just came bk...it was just fun all over agn...he changed into a better person..wow...i cant believe it..haha..and he did not smoke infront of me anymore...

o..jeez...i realise while zhen is back, i'll have to deal with his extreme lameness in life onced agn. sometimes i feel like he's not even concentrating on what he's saying...'sleepover at kenneth with him?'...he wants tht to happen this thusday...i think kenneth will kill me...haha...why would i sleep in a room where theres two guys. funny..zhen used to saying things like 'go for the guy even tho he's got a gf' or 'winter cuddle is the best and you should try it'...@.@.

i found out ming ming was here at adelaide last week...oo...my gosh....she did not contact me...eiiii...wicked.

i got a call at 9am this morning..the caller from the organ donor was asking for my full name..and i answered 'sheila tangi' or did i mentioned ting..i am not sure...but i am sure i said either one of those two....arg...damm me and my blur state...

mum asked me if i wanna go bk this year end and told her tht i dont think i wanna go back..besides meeting the most important ppl in my life, my family and my aunty...i dont think i would go bk for any reasons...i left what i'm suppose to bk in july...my heart is no longer there..and yummylicious food bk in miri, well tht can wait, my hunnie is at brunei and the gurls, are mostly here...except for sarah and pinky...i would rather dad let me spend my holidays at hong kong so i could meet ming ming n sam, or korea to sammy, or japan to aka & tori, singapore to the sg gurls...but then the choice is up to mum and dad..even if i've made my options, my parents would be the one deciding for me...

~~ sigh~~~

guys should try to smile more...cause they look cute when they smile even when they arent good looking.

What a day...i woke up with a sleepy head..went to a lecture at 9am which was canceled a week ago...i was to stupid to not know...arg!!!!....attended a one hr lecture at 10am...then did absolutely nothing productive this afternoon..then went to the gym with yy and kath...after 30 mins on the track mile...i couldn’t handle the constant yawning..so i sat down a corner of the gym and almost dozed off…what the heck!!!!...then came bk and have to witness a break up of a friend of mine…I was very bad in comforting…and then got a call from studio 2000..aparantly I won this thingy tht entitles me to have a free photo shoot session, with Mac makeup artist and a (I donno pro or not) photographer…I kept turning down the offer as I hate this kinda junk…but tht girl kept talking…jeez…she said she’s gonna ring me bk..whatever..not gonna accept it anyways…

zhen called me 20 mins ago. i donno if my chinese is getting poorer by the min or is he's chinese so much different from last time...well at least he still use the word 'chi sin' which reminds me of who he used to be.

he nge nge wanna meet up with me...i just dont wanna..but he caught me off guard..damm cheek asked about my timetable..i gave in spilling the beans without knw the intention. and now we r meeting up at thursday and he wants to hang till dinner with me.

i donno why i dont wanna meet up with him...issit due to the fact tht he just came bk from hk..and i'm just scared tht the image i have of him will be spoiled by what he hv learned there..or i'm just afriad he would pressure me into letting him sleep in my room.

he even went far enuf by going to the hall, and to the room tht i used to live in, looking for me. he thn told me there was this guy living at the room tht i used to stay.

i kept declining. and he said tht 'the reason i wanna meet up with u is to remind you tht u used to have a friend like me, i wanna catch up with you. i am just afraid u will forget about who i am and how i was like b4 i went to hk'.

i gave in...thinking "fine! how bad could it be"..as long as he doesnt annoys me like what kenyon did..boy, kenyon really drove me nuts with his attitude.

Okay..I’ve gotta say..i am trilled tht he's back from HK..but i guess he has forgotten the fact tht i asked him not to be such an ass when he comes bk. but all and all he nvr listens. I don’t know how he sees me. Zhen wanted to sleep at my room every Thursday cause he’s got classes at 9am on Friday and it takes him 2 hrs to get to uni.

First of all, i would love to have my own personal space. 2nd, he likes to sleep bare naked which i rmber clearly tht he think he’s got to show a bit of his manly guns (sickening). 3rd of all, if ming ming were to knw about this, she would kill me. 4th I’ve got clinical and have to wake up at 5am, so tht means I’ve gotta sleep at like ard 9pm. 5th, i’m a very light sleeper, so I wake up despite of the soundless footsteps in my room. 6th, if mum and dad were to knw tht i let a guy sleep in my room every Thursday, they would freak out. 7th of all, i bet this will get ppl talking. 8th of all, he would surely eat all thts in my fridge cause i knw he’s damm annoying personalities of being a greedy jerk (well, maybe this would have change after HK).

All of those words spoken was trashed out by him just so tht he can enjoy the convenience of sucking up the S**T out of me like what the HKees would do!

Enrique iglesias : girl wants him and guys wanna be like him..(need i say more) He is what i pictured my Dimika to be like.